I also have memories of me being very rude to her times and really not following her instructions or what she was expecting of me. I was the rebel in the family always questioning things as to why they were the way they were. Now I know why, cos I don’t fit into the norm :-). But I think I gave my mom a few difficult times. However all that changed once I realized what had I been doing and it turned into gratitude for the parents, specifically so when I was away from home for some time.
And then it began -the long journey of sickness for my mother. She was sick for almost 10 years but more so in her last 5 years or so when I actually started working with her. She was diagnosed with Parkinson’s but it was never established as a fact. I tried my best with therapies, supplements and a lot of things to get her to recover but I could not. It kind of frustrated me at times as to what am I doing being called a healer and still not get any results with her. Well this is the healers paradox I think where you have done all you could do but on the face of it or at least in the storyline it looks like a failure, but there are no failures I later realized.
I feel it was more a contract that I had with her that she would spur me on with her sickness to learn so many modalities, to grow myself cos half of what I learnt was fuelled by the motivation to resolve things for her. And there was a surprising part in all of
this, every time I saw her, worked with her there were visible signs of improvement like her Parkinson’s tremors would stop, she would have more balance etc. Even at times when she would not be responding to anything or anyone else if I went and called her out she would respond and would participate in whatever therapy we were working on. It was almost like she was nudging me on, that go to the next one, learn this one, telling me see it does work so don't be disheartened. I came to a realization that she was not really suffering sort of, she was like ok to be going thru all of this and at some level knew already it was like a game, a movie.
There was a change that started coming over me in this entire process, I was growing up in the healing process to realize I was not the healer, I cannot drive results here, I am just the facilitator. And this will be helpful for us to realize that whether there are results that we get here or not but there is no healing that goes waste, it definitely takes both the parties or whoever is involved to the next level. My mom transitioned in 2009 into her new role but of course she had left a big legacy of love and learning’s for me.
With Love, Respect and Gratitude to All
the Mothers of the World.